The #MenAreTrash Movement Needs to be Stopped
I feel like the movement is currently in a position where it is too far gone to re-root it.
Let’s make this clear, I am not a supporter of the #NotAllMen movement and nor am I opposing the original basis of the #MenAreTrash movement, instead I’m just voicing concerns over what the idea has become more recently.
With the airing of Love Island and the behaviour of some of the boys on the programme there has been a major uprising of the ‘men are trash’ idea. Whenever I scroll on my timeline, I see tweet after tweet saying, ‘say it together everyone, men are trash’.
I am very invested in the show myself and do also think that some of the actions of the men within ‘the villa’ have not been correct but I still don’t feel as if the entire idea of ‘men are trash’ is something which is necessary at all. I can somewhat understand the reasoning behind the constant repetition of the phrase, but I still don’t agree with it.
This idea of generalising all men to be trash is something which can put people down and hurt their self-esteem majorly. I’ve mentioned this to some people before and the typical response I get is along the lines of ‘boohoo, who cares?’ or that ‘only men who actually are trashy will get offended’.
I don’t think we should disregard the feelings of people who are being affected by this constant idea being spread across both social media and mainstream media in a ‘who cares’ fashion at all.
Other ideas which are addressing large groups of people are entirely shunned, the prime example which comes to mind is the controversy that Nicole Arbour faced in 2015 when making a video titled ‘Dear Fat People’ in which she addressed the entire ‘obese’ population of America, as she states in her video. The backlash she received for this was insane by the general population on social media and many large mainstream media outlets.
The idea of ‘men are trash’, addressing all men and people adding whatever fuel they want to the fire online, I feel as if is somewhat similar. So why is the backlash non-existent and the behaviour becoming not only excused but praised on social media? Girls tweeting ‘men are trash’ while their friends retweet and reply ‘preach girl!’. It just doesn’t seem right at all.
People say that only men who behave in ‘trashy’ ways are the ones who will be offended, however if the idea is addressing all men then it’s bound to affect some people who don’t behave in such a way. In the same way that the ‘Dear Fat People’ was said to only be addressing people in America who are medically classified as obese, it hurt many people around the globe including those who are not obese. I genuinely think I need someone to explain to me how ‘men are trash’ is any different.
One of my friends attempted to explain to me over a year ago that the ‘men are trash’ idea is actually a movement against the patriarchy. One article I read stated that
The phrase ‘men are trash’ can actually be directly translated into; ‘masculinity is in transition and it’s not moving fucking fast enough.’ THAT’S what it really means.
However, for me this is something I see through so easily. I don’t think hundreds of thousands of young women everywhere are tweeting that men are trash because of masculinity not moving fast enough. I think this is something which can easily be used as a cover up when people can see that their actions and words are affecting men everywhere.
I did some digging and found that the movement, which started as a hashtag #MenAreTrash was actually started on an anti-patriarchal premise. Something I read stated that:
Men Are Trash is an anti-patriarchal movement and let’s just be clear that it has nothing to do with the fact that men are trashy love interests/ partners and everything to do with the oppressive systems that are imposed on *womxn that men nurture and even actively participate in.
This idea and movement is something I can 100% stand behind and support, however I think the message has been lost over time. This is no longer what #MenAreTrash is about at all and instead has become exactly what the writer of the article has said it has nothing to do with. ‘The fact that men are trashy love interests/partners’ has become the main reason that women are tweeting and posting ‘men are trash’ everywhere.
I feel like the movement is currently in a position where it is too far gone to re-root it, however if it can be done then it needs to be done. If this can’t happen then the movement needs to be ridded of all together as it is hurting men all around the world.
The patriarchy sucks, and men definitely actively participate in imposing oppressive systems on women, sometimes, unknowingly however this does not mean that men are trashy love interests who all treat women like shit.
I’d love to hear any opinions on this topic, whether in agreement with mine or not.
